The Tea that Wasn’t Served
Reb Moshe Bulvin was a “simple” ba’al habayis living in pre-war Grodno, though in truth, he was not so simple at all.
Tragically, he suffered the loss of three of his children in a terrible accident. The great Rosh Yeshiva Rav Shimon Shkop came to be menachem aveil, offering Reb Moshe heartfelt words of nechamah. During their conversation, Reb Moshe asked Rav Shimon what he should do l’iluy nishmas his precious children.
Rav Shimon thought briefly and then responded, “Right now, unfortunately, you have three empty beds in your house. Perhaps,” he suggested, “you can welcome three yeshivah bachurim into your house and let them sleep in those beds. This will serve as a tremendous zechus for the children that you lost.”
After shivah, Reb Moshe indeed followed through with Rav Shkop’s suggestion. He invited three bachurim not only to sleep in his home, but he fed them and cared for them as well. And each night, after they returned from Maariv, he greeted them with hot tea, a special treat.
When he placed the first cup down, Reb Moshe stated softly, “L’zecher nishmas my Dovid.” As he placed the second cup down, he said, “L’zecher nishmas my Avremel.” And as he placed the third cup down, he murmured, “L’zecher nishmas my daughter Rochel.”
The bachurim were moved and touched by Reb Moshe’s kindness and hospitality.
There was one problem. In truth, most nights, the bachurim wished to stay in the beis medrash after Maariv to continue their learning. Yet they understood how meaningful it was for Reb Moshe to prepare this tea for them. What took precedence in this case?
Finally, they asked Reb Moshe straight out if he would be okay with them staying out later to learn.
Reb Moshe listened to them and immediately encouraged them to stay as late as they wished. Appreciating the value of their Torah learning, he chose to pass up the zechus of making them their tea in favor of their increased Torah study; by the time they would return, he would be sleeping.
Several weeks later, one of the bachurim was not feeling well and stayed in bed all day. That night, as Reb Moshe stood up from his chair to go to bed, the sick bachur overheard him saying, “Ribono shel Olam, once again tonight I am not preparing tea for the bachurim, l’iluy nishmas the neshamos of my precious children.”
(There’s More to the Story by Rabbi Yechiel Spero, Artscroll Publications, page 74-76.)
There are so many ways to serve Hashem and earn zechuyos for our loved ones and ourselves. Sometimes holding back from serving Hashem the way we want to can be so hard, but can be a greater zechus.
Take This Home
As you go about your activities today, remember that you can serve Hashem best not by doing what you want, but by doing what is right. That is fulfilling the ratzon Hashem.
At least once today say: “I am doing [insert action] because this is what Hashem wants l’iluy nishmas [insert name of loved one].”
In Short
“We know that we’ll have to pay up for doing aveiros, yet we still don’t talk about it. We push aside any unpleasant thoughts about Gehinnom. There is a mesechta called maseches Gehinnom. Chazal wrote it for a purpose: that we should learn it!
It used to be that every child knew about Gehinnom. It was something that people always remembered – and it helped them [so that they could save themselves from Gehinnom by making the right choices]!”
It Happened to Me!
My Olam Haba Moment
A family member was given a significant sum of money to be used for the purchase of a new car. I heard him discussing different options, trying to determine the best value for his needs.
Several weeks later, I was surprised to see him driving around in his new vehicle – a very scaled-down version of what he had been originally considering. When I pressed him for an explanation, the story came out. Someone had apprised him of a family he knew that was in desperate financial straits. He calculated the surplus of money he would have if he would buy the most basic model car and gave that money to the family in need. The car would be his for a finite number of years, he explained. The money he gave, on the other hand, was his forever.
T.C.
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