Missing My Friend
Dear Devorah, (name changed)
I miss you so much, and I yearn to speak to you. I want to know what is going on for you. What is it like up there?
We used to talk so much. Years ago, when I used to stop by your house for a quick visit, my children would make fun of me. Oh, a quick visit, they would say. Okay, we’ll see you next week. We were able to talk for hours. Not only because we were good friends but because you had an engaging personality that enabled you to speak to anyone. Although you didn’t want to come out much the last few summers of your life, we neighbors would say, “Why doesn’t Devorah come out. She is so much fun to talk with. She definitely can provide some comic relief for us. Yes, it was so enjoyable to be around you.
I Saw You Suffer
We would talk it out. And the conversation always went to Hashem. You would say, “What I am struggling with is what Hashem wants from me. And I know I must accept it and make the best of it. I am going to try to strengthen my relationship with Hashem.” No matter what was going on, no matter how difficult the challenge you might be facing, you would always find the good in your life. You would express gratitude to Hashem for all the good that He had given you. “Chasdei Hashem, chasdei Hashem,” you would say.
Each child of yours held a treasured place in your heart. Each one was so special to you. You loved them so dearly and wanted only the best for them. Your thoughts were constantly on what they might need and how you could best help them out.
And when you felt that they were unjustly upset at you, you tried to understand it from their perspective. As much as you were suffering, so were the children. You understood that. But most of all, you wanted to be there for them and have a pleasant relationship with each one.
Can You Please Talk to Me
I am stuck. I miss you, but I can’t speak to you. I want to call you, but I know that you won’t answer. I am waiting for you to call me, but I know how silly that is. And I think to myself, Devorah, what can I do for you?
Deep in my heart, I know what I can do. I know that you would want me to make sure that your children are okay – those precious children whom you loved so very much. Those beloved children in whom you believed so strongly. Those precious diamonds that you held so dear in your heart.
And so, this is what I would wish to say to your children:
Your mother suffered. She suffered in a lot of different ways.
She was sick, and she valiantly tried to overcome her illness. But before she had a chance to get completely better, Corona came and took away her chances.
Always remember that she loved you and continues to love you so, so much.
Tough Times
There may be tough days ahead. There may be rough times: times when you’ll want to scream and yell; times when you’ll want to run away; times when you want to look toward Hashem and say: Hashem, why?
But there is one thing that you can always hold onto, and that is your mother’s love. Yes, your mother’s deep love is powerful enough to carry you through because she loves you and cares about you like no one else in the world.
As for me, I will hold on to the one tangible thing that I have. It’s a message from your mother that is saved on my phone. I love listening to it and hearing her voice. And I have the label of the last mishloach manos that she lovingly packed up. When I look at it, I think of my dear friend, your mother. I will miss her. I will always have fond memories of her tucked away in my heart.
Miriam Ribiat
Chevrah Lomdei Mishnah / The Society for Mishnah Study is a 501(c)3 non-profit organization dedicated to providing loved ones eternal merit through Torah Study and Prayer.
